When we think of the giants of early psychology, Sigmund Freud and Carl Jung often come to mind first. They explored the depths of the unconscious, dreams, and archetypes. Yet, standing alongside them, though sometimes less heralded outside of academic circles, is Alfred Adler. His insights into human nature offer a compelling practicality that resonates deeply. Adler wasn't focused solely on the hidden past; he provided a more common-sense perspective on why we act as we do and how we can shape a more fulfilling life. He believed that often, our suffering stems not just from life's difficulties, but from the choices we make when faced with them. Let's explore this idea through the lens of Adler's individual psychology.

The Guiding Power of Goals and the Ideal Self

Adler proposed that to truly understand someone, we must first recognize that human actions are fundamentally goal-oriented. This concept, known as teleology, suggests everything we do is aimed at achieving something. As Adler wrote in "Understanding Human Nature," this striving towards a goal is inherent in how we adapt to the world.

We all have numerous goals across different life areas. According to Adler, these goals aren't random; they are organized around a central, ultimate aim he termed the "ideal self." This is the image of the person we aspire to become, a vision often formed in our early years as we ponder our place in the world and who we want to be. This ideal self doesn't just sit passively; it actively shapes the direction of our lives, pulling us toward a potential future.

The Drive to Improve and Our Unique Lifestyle

Our ideal self is crucial because it influences what Adler identified as the primary motivator of human behavior: the striving for superiority. This isn't necessarily about dominating others, but rather an innate drive to improve our situation, overcome limitations, and move towards a feeling of competence and completion – essentially, as Adler put it, moving "from a minus situation to a plus situation."

While this drive is innate, how we strive is determined by our unique ideal self. Throughout life, we learn which behaviors and thoughts seem to bring us closer to this ideal and which hold us back. This learning process shapes what Adler called our "lifestyle" – a subjective, often unconscious set of guiding principles we develop to navigate life and pursue our goals.

Adler cautioned against judging a lifestyle as inherently "right" or "wrong" in a vacuum. Its effectiveness is revealed only when tested by life's challenges. As Harold Mosak and Michael Maniacci noted, Adler saw every lifestyle as functional until it encountered a task it wasn't prepared for. It's in those moments that its weaknesses emerge.

Facing Feelings of Inferiority

When our lifestyle proves inadequate for a task, or when we perceive shortcomings in ourselves relative to our goals, feelings of inferiority can arise. These feelings are based on our subjective evaluations. They might be triggered by objective shortcomings – perhaps we feel less intelligent, less athletic, or less wealthy than others. However, an objective flaw only causes feelings of inferiority if it clashes with what is important to our ideal self. If wealth isn't part of your ideal, being poor might not trigger inferiority feelings. Conversely, these feelings can arise even without objective flaws, based purely on self-perception.

How we respond to these feelings profoundly impacts our well-being. Adler saw two main paths.

Coping vs. Defensive Behavior

The first path involves viewing the circumstances triggering inferiority feelings as challenges to be overcome, leading to coping strategies:

• Direct Problem Solving: If we believe we can tackle the root cause, we take direct action. If unemployed, we search for a job. If lacking a skill, we learn it.
• Compensation: If direct resolution isn't possible, we compensate. We find another area where we can achieve success, balancing out the perceived deficiency. Adler himself, facing health issues in childhood that limited physical activity, compensated by immersing himself in reading and developing his intellect, eventually charming others with his knowledge.

The second path involves viewing these circumstances as problems to be avoided, leading to defensive behavior. This involves trying to convince ourselves and others that our lack of progress is due to external obstacles beyond our control. It's an escape. This can manifest as:

• Developing physical symptoms (headaches, fatigue) used as excuses.
• Developing anxiety disorders, where fears become the rationale for inaction.
• Employing what Adler called "striving for distance" – procrastinating, taking minimal steps before retreating to safety.

We all use psychological defenses sometimes, and that's normal. The danger lies in over-reliance. As noted scholar Henri Ellenberger observed, Adler saw those who heavily depended on defenses as essentially using tricks to dodge life's responsibilities. Eventually, these excuses wear thin.

The Trap of Unrealistic Ideals and the Need for Courage

When defenses stop working, we face another choice: finally tackle the problem directly, or completely give up on the challenge, potentially leading to what Adler termed an "inferiority complex."

Sometimes, difficulty facing challenges stems from an unhealthy ideal self – one that is perhaps too perfectionistic, or overly focused on unattainable levels of external validation like wealth, status, or fame. Such unrealistic ideals set us up for failure, making defensive behavior seem like the only option. Examining and adjusting our ideal self towards something more grounded is often a crucial step.

Ultimately, however, even with a realistic ideal, positive change requires courage. Adler emphasized that courage isn't an innate trait you either have or don't; it's a willingness to act despite risks and unknown outcomes. It's about engaging with life even when uncomfortable. Psychotherapy, in Adler's view, should aim to foster this courageous attitude.

Life will inevitably present challenges. We face a fundamental choice: We can choose to cultivate courage, learning to live with the uncertainty and discomfort that accompany growth. Or, we can choose perceived safety, retreating from challenges and potentially letting our potential wither within a shrinking comfort zone.

May you find the strength to move towards your goals and stay true to your path. Remember the words of the writer Ivan Bahryany: "The brave always have happiness."

References

• Adler, A. (1998). Understanding Human Nature. Oneworld Publications. 
  This foundational work by Adler himself delves into core concepts like the goal-oriented nature of behavior (teleology), the development of the "style of life," the origins and impact of feelings of inferiority, and the importance of social interest. It provides direct insight into Adler's perspective on why people act the way they do.
• Adler, A. (2011). The Practice and Theory of Individual Psychology. Routledge. 
  Another key text by Adler, this book elaborates on the practical application of his theories, including the striving for superiority (moving from minus to plus), the concept of the "ideal self" (as part of the goal structure), methods for understanding an individual's unique lifestyle, and the therapeutic goal of encouraging courage and overcoming discouragement.
• Mosak, H. H., & Maniacci, M. P. (2008). A Primer of Adlerian Psychology: The Analytic-Behavioral-Cognitive Psychology of Alfred Adler. Routledge.
  This book serves as a comprehensive introduction to Adlerian psychology, written by prominent figures in the field. It explains concepts like lifestyle, the inferiority complex, goal-striving, and therapeutic techniques in accessible terms, confirming and expanding on the ideas presented in the article, including the notion that lifestyles are generally functional until tested. (Specific pages vary significantly by edition).